What fanfic would go with this picture? Let's see...let's say Ralph fell down a deep pit so fast he couldn't let out a peep and Vanellope never heard him. No problem..climbing steep sheer walls is Ralph's day job. Meanwhile big ugly Sugar Rush Monster stalks Vanellope. Lots of screaming, squealing, glitching, and near wetting of panties. Vanellope vows to learn better teleport capability. Also vows to teach Palace Oreo Guard how to fly Apache helicopters and hum "Flight of the Valkyries". You are sitting in your chair and humming it right now to see what it would sound like. Major chase scene, finally ending in Vanellope being cornered...at which point she flips to full Princess-In-Your-Face mode, including double barreled load of (shudder) sarcasm. Ralph arrives to render Chastisement with Extreme Prejudice. Vanellope, still in Sovereign mode says "Ralph! Please stop pummeling one of my citizens into the ground!" Several minutes later she repeats it loud enough for Ralph to actually hear it. Attitude Adjusted Monster leads way to Adorabeezle's cute Alpine Chateau. 'Beezie' says "Oh, I forgot to warn you about the horrible..oh but I see you've already met!" Hot chocolates all around. Vanellope wipes away chocolate moustache and chirps "I can't wait to visit Citrusella in the Sinister Sucola Sugar Swamp!" Ralph shoves her into a snowbank. End credits.
(no, I'm not developing this. Anyone who wants to...have at it.) (ok, I lied..I'd like to put in where awhile back Mr. Abominable (not being highly intelligent) ate a whole bunch of strangely glowing green lozenges he found in his caverns, and tooted for three weeks. But that's as far as I'm going! I swear! End of discussion!)
Ok, getting clearer picture. He's got HUGE cake-piped eyebrows:thick and bushy. MEAN looking! Kinda like some old prospector. He's NOT made of ice-cream..just looks like it. Otherwise he won't be able to visit Vanellope in warmer parts of Sugar Rush. He's part of a bonus level and his job is to thwart the racers...what other reason would there be for him to exist? He comes roaring out of the bushes, only to be nonplussed when Vanellope turns on him. She's not going with the program and he pouts and points out that she's supposed to run..everyone else has run from him before, and she's messing his schedule up. Could she at least take off in the right direction? How about a slow walk? Could she at least let out a few squeals like she first did when she first saw him? She disses him and he tries to scare her..Ralph arrives, yanks him off his feet (V.V. is not quite as tall as Ralph) but Vanellope intervenes before any blows are made. All three begin to argue. Ralph pushes finger at V.V. and tells him to shut up. V.V. pushes back and says he doesn't take any orders from anyone other then the Princess Vanellope. Van. says " I AM Vanellope!" VV sez "if you're Princess Vanellope, where's your scepter and royal racing outfit!" Ralph says "She IS Princess Vanellope!" Van. sez "PRESIDENT Vanellope!" Vanilla Villain says "HA! GOT YA, Imposter! I don't take no orders from no PRESIDENT! Only PRINCESS Vanellope!" She says "Ok fine! I'm PRINCESS Vanellope!" V.V. sticks fingers in ears "I can't HEAR you! I can't HEAR YOU ! I scream! You scream! We all scream for Ice-cream!" Ralph grabs VV by lapels and shakes him "Listen! It's a long story! She IS Princess Vanellope!" V.V. lowers dangerous eyebrows and it looks like disaster is about to occur...Vanellope screams, stamping her foot so that icicles fall off the trees "I*AM*PRINCESS*VANELLOPE!"
Poof, pink scepter appears in right hand. Poof-poof, she's wearing her royal racing outfit(the white one with the green strips..not her poofy pin..er SALMON..dress). Ralph drops VV. "Kid! How....How did you DO that??" Vanellope looks shocked. "I.....I don't...I don't know..."
Vanilla Villain stares, then goes to one knee. "You ARE Princess Vanellope." Then looks up petulantly "But still, you're still supposed to RUN from me. This is all highly irregular! What do you WANT of me, Princess???"
And story continues....etc. etc. And yes, he turns out to be quite nice and sweet and stuff, darn it. Ralph never gets to beat him up. Ball now to you..
Oh.and maybe name is "Rocky. Rocky Street! Like it? I made it up myself!" Ralph exchanges 'oh that explains THAT!' expression with Vanellope.
Ok, imperative that better pun be found for Vanilla Villain's name. Pesky local critic gently suggests that 'Rocky Steet' is "INCREDIBLY TOE-SUCKINGLY STUPID!" I admit that the pun was so bad that it made my teeth numb. Pesky local critic is correct. Pesky local critic is also being left out of my Will. Must find more attractive and more appropriate name for Vanilla Villain.
Plot twists, Vanilla villain is actually really nice, but because it's not the coldest season right now his mouth melted and it's kinda hard to talk, Vanellope screams with him and he starts to e all sweet and stuff, Ralph finds them and gets the situation all wrong and starts beating the poor thing while vanellope goes all "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!" And after that the freeze kingdom starts to get a new supply of icy candy every year to avoid the discomfort of vanellope's citizens :3
....maybe Vanilla Villain has long flowing beard that has dairy-queen type ripples? Or similar type 'hat' or wavy 'hair'.. Beard would make him look tougher..with curl on end? Just saw Sandman from Rise of the Guardians. Similar ripples..? Looks so yummy! Maybe some Rocky Road thrown in for toughness....spiked belt made out of....phooy..candy corn would be WAY too obvious. Gotta be something different..durn it, I'm putting in WAY too much time on this!
hmmmmm..interesting idea, but ruins getting any sadistic glee out of Ralph's rescue! That makes Ralph look and feel bad, and now I only have sympathy for Vanilla. I don't want Ralph whipping the cream out of someone who doesn't deserve it! If Ralph is going to come to the rescue, it needs to be because a rescue is needed. How about Vanilla is PROGRAMMED to chase racers when they come on the ice racing track. He's an obstacle you have to overcome in the race. Not his fault, just what he's supposed to do. That puts him in Ralph's situation. I don't want TOO big a misunderstanding here! "Gee, I'm just doing my JOB, dude!" Or suppose he's actually DEFENDING Sugar Rush? Imagine classic face-off between the two, then sudden realization that they are not enemies, but that there is a THIRD entity present who IS a threat and Ralph and Vanilla join forces to defeat it. It has to be clear that Vanilla can hold his own against a Cy-Bug. He has to be menacing enough to be taken seriously. (enemy can't be a cy-bug..we've had too much of cy-bugs to repeat that. Can't be Turbo cuz Turbo is dead. Really dead. Maybe it's a SITUATION that's the problem, and not another enemy;they have to work together to stop an avalanche or something, and Vanilla was trying to warn them.....have to sleep on this one..)
Oh,And +++ on idea of ice candy supply! Top Shelf!
On reflection, you are right. While at some point her ability would permit her to teleport to any location just by thinking about it, that would be a skill that takes time and training. She'd not have that ability right away. She's not helpless, but fog and night would shut her superpowers down considerably. And the worst part is why is Ralph not answering? He's not one to play jokes on her. If he was there just a few minutes ago, why can't he hear her? That's the part that makes it scary. There should not be any dangers left in Sugar Rush, right? Right? Right?????